Each and every day I have been putting on a fake face mask. A mask having a fake smile, fake expressions and fake happiness. A mask that I have to put o to be “accepted” by society, by people. Acting to be perfect, acting as society wants, as people want. Trying to fit into the “guidelines” laid out by them. But in this process I turned into something that I hate. That I absolutely hate.
The world isfull of fake people with their fake smile, fake attitude, fake life and fake soul. We tend to loose ourselves in trying to make ourselves perfect. This thought has killed me inside. I’m not me anymore. I used to be strong and happy and independent and confident. But now I have become a differebt person altogether. I’m desperately searching for the old me. The person who was an intovert but not underconfident. Who was straightforward but not arrogant. And I find that person, I find her when I dance until my feet hurt, read until my eyes burn and think until I fall asleep. That person is still alive. Weak but alive. There is still a chance that I can be me again. I can be free again. I will keep fighting. This is not a fight between life or death. But it is a fight between fairness and reality. Only time will tell who wins. Only my strength and willpower will determine whether I will continue to fit in and be unhappy or or be an outcast and live a life of pure bliss and enjoyment. The process is complicated, the path is difficult but the rewards, the rewards make it totally worth the pains.
Besides it’s the journey that matters. It’s the journey that Mae’s the destination more exciting and worthwhile. Many people may come and support us and we should appreciate them but at the same time we should not forget that they can only help us prepare for the fight but they cannot fight our battles instead of us….
